Preparatory Phases

The Disposition Days (continued)
 

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Complete section Chapters 1 through 6
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Chapter Five

Listening To Prayer Unit 4 On Freedom
Introducing Prayer Unit 5 And The Principle And Foundation
Awareness Examen

        Prayer Units 4 and 5 deal with the First Principle and Foundation (P & F) -- Prayer Unit 4 from an experiential viewpoint; Prayer Unit 5 from a more reflective and cognitive viewpoint. According to the hypothetical pattern I am using in this manual, two weeks are devoted to this theme rather than one in order to give more time for this theme to be appropriated -- at least with some understanding and hopefully with real desire. Prayer Unit 4 introduces the directee to scriptural examples of Spiritual Freedom. When God is allowed to pour out God's love into our hearts, we become more open to trust, to believe in the impossible, to desire lifestyle changes, to follow challenging inspirations, to grow in single-mindedness, etc. (Rom 5:5).

        Your hope is that your directee will come to appreciate the importance of being spiritually free. This implies:

1. Some understanding of the concept of Spiritual Freedom
    (indifference /detachment) and how it relates to his Christian life;
2. A desire to become spiritually free;
3. A practical awareness of an area in his life where he needs to grow
    in freedom; for example:
  • Some prejudice concerning the relative merits of one calling over another -- church ministry to be more important than teaching in the classroom;
  • Self-centredness which can trivialize God's call to him;
  • Inordinate Attachments which affect decision-making -- for example, the excessive need for nurturing his inner psyche;
  • Fears or anxieties which interfere with the use of his gifts for others;
  • Need to expand his horizons of church, human family, social responsibilities, and self;
  • Awareness that he may have a fixed idea of roles in society and that he needs to become less responsible or more responsible in his interactions with others.
    •         It would be a definite sign of your directee's readiness for the Exercises journey if he were to receive from his prayer exercises of Prayer Unit 4 such understanding and such desire. However, your role is to listen for, and to encourage, whatever aspect of this theme seems to be emerging. Obviously, if your directee is still struggling to pray with scripture, or to put in his committed time of prayer, or to articulate what is going on in his prayer, then all these hopes and things to encourage are mere theory. If so, you may be wondering about his readiness to enter the Exercises journey. I shall address this issue in the next chapter. Meanwhile, attend to your directee's level of growth at this point, and attempt to encourage those very responses and glimmers which foster greater openness to God's action in his heart.
     

            If nothing seems to be emerging from your directee's prayer that harmonizes with this theme, and if you hear no appreciation of what it means to be spiritually free, it may be wise to enter into a direct discussion on the theme of freedom. This is a topic that is basic to both human and spiritual living. A simple discussion of this theme may help to create the mental structure which will bear fruit later. Perhaps you could begin here by witnessing to your own growth in appreciation of this gift:

    "... When I first came across the word Spiritual Freedom, I didn't quite know what it meant. What do you think of when you hear the word freedom?" Or you could say, "Some people react to the Abraham story angrily. It seems that God wasn't too fair! How does it strike you?" Or you could ask, "How do you need God's help to be free?"
    If the theme of Spiritual Freedom is emerging and there is a growing awareness and desire for this gift, you can encourage or affirm these movements by making a comment similar to one of the following:         Somewhere in the course of this interview, investigate how your directee is making use of the Additions. Does he understand the meaning of the principle of harmony, and if so, how is he beginning to apply this principle to the way he lives his day and prepares for his prayer exercises?

            Now is the time to explain the use of the Awareness Examen. Do so, however, according to your directee's level. If he has been receiving the graces of these Disposition Days and if he is growing in the ability to articulate and reflect upon his experiences, explain the steps of the Awareness Examen(18) and stress the experiential part of it -- that is, the reflection upon his interior feelings, reactions, and movements. You could explain how this Awareness Examen is a daily exercise for Spiritual Freedom because it puts one in contact with God's inspirations and leadings throughout the day. It is an instrument to help uncover the blocks to these movements. During the Exercises journey, the Awareness Examen is also a way to check on how one is faithful to the principle of harmony through a relevant use of the Additions. Thus, the Awareness Examen is an instrument of discernment and discovery. Through it, your directee is helped to notice in his daily life the very Grace he prayed for in the prayer exercise.

            On the other hand, if your directee is still struggling to be open in prayer, still confused about how to express his experience, and still somewhat overwhelmed by the concepts you have introduced thus far, simply ask him to set aside a short period with God every evening for a "heart-to-heart talk with Jesus at the end of the day." Teach him to be with God. It may be better to introduce the Awareness Examen with more detail at a later time. We often forget that both the skill and the practice of making the Awareness Examen take a long time to learn.

            If your directee is using the Review of prayer and is learning through it to notice his interior experience, then that practice, in itself, is a good preparation for developing the skill of using the Awareness Examen. The Awareness Examen is to the experience of the past day what the Review is to the experience of the past prayer exercise.(19) In time, the Awareness Examen becomes a very important instrument to help one find God in daily events by noticing one's interior reactions to them and then by reflecting on their meaning. But how should this be taught? Does one teach the framework of the Awareness Examen and hope that the reflecting-on-experience part will somehow take place in time? On the other hand, should one gradually teach the reflecting-on-experience part first? As prayer guide, it will be up to you to decide this according to your perception of your directee's needs. One thing is certain: after the Exercises journey is over, the Awareness Examen will remain a significant instrument for your directee's continuing spiritual growth. The Spiritual Exercises as a whole help a person to grow in the practice of the Awareness Examen. As you continue to help your directee notice what is going on in his prayer and as you gradually encourage him to bring his life experiences to God in prayer, you are helping him to notice the meaning of these experiences. All this is helping him to use the Awareness Examen.

            Since the Awareness Examen(20) often uses the external framework of the general examen [43] with its five `points,' the Awareness Examen is often associated and confused with it. However, the general examen is very different from the Awareness Examen. What Ignatius describes is the `examination of conscience' which is an examination of one's actions and choices in the light of the moral law. The examination of conscience is that practice Catholic Christians use in preparation for receiving the sacrament of reconciliation. Also, many Christians make such an examination of conscience for a few moments during their evening prayers. No doubt, during the exercises of the First Week, you will be encouraging your directee to make the examination of conscience in order to become more aware of his sinfulness. Usually the Awareness Examen presupposes some form of the examination of conscience because one cannot reflect upon how one has been responding to God's word without being aware of areas that are in disharmony with the law of love.

            The examination of conscience usually does not include the Awareness Examen. As Ignatius says in notation [32]: "The purpose of the examination of conscience is to purify the soul and to aid us to improve our confessions." The examination of conscience asks, "Where have I offended God today?"(21) On the other hand, the purpose of the Awareness Examen is to look at, and pay attention to, the experiences and movements that take place within the heart throughout the day. It helps one to discover what God is revealing through these experiences and movements. The Awareness Examen asks, "Where has God been drawing me today? Where was God's grace in evidence today?" The ultimate purpose of the Awareness Examen is to live a life of discernment.

            The Awareness Examen, as we have come to understand and appreciate it, began with the insightful article of George Aschenbrenner published in Review for Religious in 1972. He recognized that Ignatius practised such reflection on his experience as a habit. Near the end of his life, Ignatius said that "whenever he wished, at whatever hour, he could find God."(22) Aschenbrenner adopted the framework for the Awareness Examen from notation [43] which Ignatius used for the general examination of conscience. This framework may be helpful for paying attention to one's interior reactions. However, the skill and art of reflecting on one's interior experiences of the day is the heart of the Awareness Examen, not an external framework. Moreover, during the Exercises journey, this skill of reflecting upon one's interior experiences to discover God's movements is related more to the Guidelines for Discerning Spirits and to the practice and experience of the Review and Repetition than to the general examination of conscience of notation [43].

            You can introduce the Awareness Examen to your directee at some point early in the Exercises, and if fitting, during this interview. As the process of the Exercises continues, hopefully several of the following dimensions of the Awareness Examen, particularly c) and e), will be appropriated:

    a) The framework;
    b) An implied examination of conscience;
    c) A constant attempt to reflect upon his interior experience, both
        psychologically and spiritually;
    d) A checking on his use of the Additions;
    e) In time, a recognition of his interior experiences as movements of
        Consolation or Desolation and a facility to discern these movements
        whenever he is making decisions.
            Towards the end of this interview, give your directee Prayer Unit 5. On the supposition that you will want him to pray over this material as is, explain the two Graces being sought:
    a) The first is that of understanding.
    b) The second is a deep trust that Jesus, now risen and alive, has
        the power to give the enlightenment and the strength needed by
        the directee to hear, and then to follow, wherever and however
        God calls him.
            Spend time stressing how a more reflective approach ought to be used for the a) - d) prayer exercises on the P & F. In this approach, the directee brings all of his powers of assimilating and reflecting that he would bring naturally when he reads a special letter from someone he loves.(23) No doubt, you have been encouraging your directee to be more passive in prayer with scripture, to listen and let go. For this phase, you could encourage a more active and reflective form of prayer:
    "... I would suggest you approach the first half of your prayer exercise with the same concentration that you would use when reading a very special letter from someone you love. Read the material carefully and mull it over with your imagination, mind, and heart. Then in the latter half of the period, hang loose. Let the words and images sink in. Allow time for your intuition and God to juggle some of the images and thoughts and to give you a deepening appreciation of them. Your careful and reflective reading is like tending vines in a garden.... Your hanging loose is like allowing rain to nurture them.... This prayerful reflection on the First Principle and Foundation is intended to establish a structure for the process of the Exercises to develop. It's like a wooden trellis on which the vines can grow...."
            The purpose of asking your directee to write his own rendition of the P & F is to further his understanding of it. This understanding will be very important for him after the Exercises journey. We live our spiritual lives and we make decisions not just from prayer experiences but also from values which we frequently articulate to ourselves through principles and maxims. After the Exercises journey has been completed, values such as those contained in the P & F will be helpful: choosing what is `most conducive' to God's service, importance of indifference or Spiritual Freedom when making choices, all created things can be used inasmuch as their purpose is respected, etc.

            Finally, spend some time focusing your directee on the Risen Lord and his Spirit as in the prayer matter of e) and f): "... When Ignatius uses the phrase, `serve God our Lord,' as in the first line of the P & F [23], he is referring to the Lord Jesus. Right from the beginning of the Exercises journey, you are with Jesus Risen. The P & F may appear difficult. Don't worry. Jesus is with you throughout. Let Jesus' Spirit give you the strength and the power that you need...."

            The P & F is made up of a series of truths and principles that are basic to a serious Christian life. They represent an attitude of mind and heart that comes from the energy of being accepted and loved. This disposes the heart to express this love in deeds: "What can I return to our God for all that God has given to me?" (Ps 116:12). The desire for that energy which empowers a person to live a life in harmony with the P & F is a sign of readiness for the First Week of the Exercises journey.

            The Disposition Days, of which the P & F is a part, is the preparatory phase before a directee begins the Four Weeks of the Exercises journey. This phase can take a very short or a very long time.(24) Some may complete this preparatory phase in the few weeks envisaged by this manual; others may need several months. The foundational grace of this phase is the experience of creaturehood with its deep-felt awareness of one's basic identity as a child of God. This cannot be mere notional belief. The real belief in one's identity as a beloved creature depends on a nurturing God present NOW as one becomes deeply aware of how one's personal history and God's involvement actually intersect.

            "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free" can be the overall rubric under which the Exercises function. Some truths, however, are very hard to take and cannot be deeply received unless there is a safe place on which to stand while one is absorbing them. The function of the Dispositions Days is to ensure such a safe place so that a directee may have a secure sense that freedom is really possible. Without this sense, it is too difficult, or even impossible, to assimilate the subject matter of the First Week -- the fallen world and one's own sin as a contributing part in it. During this preparatory phase, particularly in the articulation of the P & F, some idea of the work ahead is established. The goal is outside of oneself -- in the future with God's grace. This goal shapes and qualifies the entire work. Furthermore, it establishes the paradox: if one is to be spiritually free, one must be willing to give up control.(25)

            Spiritual Freedom is the goal of the whole process of the Exercises journey. Ignatius expresses it this way: the Exercises have as their purpose "to conquer oneself and regulate one's life without determining oneself through any tendency that is disordered" [21]. Expressed in another way, Spiritual Freedom exists in those moments when a person is so filled with love for God that all the desires of one's heart and the affectivities, thoughts, decisions and actions that flow from these desires are oriented towards God. Ignatius knows that it is not the directee who does the "conquering and the regulating"; he knows that this is God's work. Freedom comes from God communicating love and energy in a personal relationship of grace:

            In the Spiritual Exercises, when seeking the Divine Will, it is more fitting and much better, that the Creator and Lord, God's very self, should communicate God's self to the devout soul, inflaming it with God's own love and praise, and disposing it for the way in which it will be better able to serve God in future. So, the director of the Exercises should not turn or incline to one side or the other, but standing in the centre like a balance, leave the Creator to act immediately with the creature, and the creature with one's Creator and Lord [15].

            This notation captures the mystery of God's communication and the prayer guide's role during the Exercises journey. It means that the role of the prayer guide is to sit on the sidelines and to discern if someone or something other than God is doing the communicating. Some prayer guides interpret this notation as if this applies to the preparatory phases. I believe differently. I believe that this notation applies only when your directee is open enough to allow God's personal communication -- the point when your directee has come to the Contemplative Attitude, when he has finally allowed himself to be available to God, when God's mystery is allowed to touch his mystery. This is the time to pull back: to watch, to wait and to discern. From this point onwards, let the dynamic behind the structure of the Exercises work.

            As prayer guide, what is your stance before this moment is reached? In my opinion, you can become as involved as necessary in order to help dispose your directee for this moment. Sometimes you will teach different methods of prayer or different ways to relax. Other times you will simply chit-chat to establish the kind of relaxed atmosphere that might aid your directee's openness with God. My point is this: before that moment when your directee's real self is open to God's personal communication, you can, and should, enter into the dynamic more directly. But after that moment, you should stand in the centre like a balance or "be like a balance at equilibrium" (Puhl). In notation [15], I believe that Ignatius is referring to a directee who has entered into the dynamic of the Exercises journey.

            It is dangerous to interpret the instructions of the Exercises to the prayer guide, such as that in notation [15], too literally with a directee who has not allowed God to touch his real self. The danger is one that psychologists call `transference.' It can happen in the following way. The "literal" prayer guide interprets these instructions as applying in all situations. Therefore she waits on the sidelines for the movements to take place. Not wanting to interfere with God's activity, she simply waits with a kind of non-involved passivity with her struggling directee. Meanwhile, her struggling directee, both unconsciously and consciously, misinterprets why his prayer guide is sitting on the sidelines. At this point, the directee begins to relate as he once did to some threatening person in his past -- teacher, coach, parent, sibling, etc. Transference has taken place! At this point, the prayer guide herself can be caught with a transference of her own -- a countertransference!

           We are all familiar with the obvious ways we can be caught with inappropriate reactions. A directee, not receiving sufficient affection at home, looks to his prayer guide for it. A prayer guide who is threatened by any expression of anger fails to notice the anger that is being expressed by the directee. We also know how our own personal need to have significance can prejudice the way we listen to another. But as prayer guides, we can unintentionally misuse our skills by not recognizing the co-dependent relationship that is beginning to happen. Thus, it is very important for us to be aware of our own state of Consolation or Desolation when we are listening to our directees. It is usually when we are experiencing Desolation that unhelpful responses to our directees can arise. "The thoughts [and therefore, the interpretations] that flow from Consolation are the opposite of those that flow from Desolation" [317].

            How does a prayer guide avoid the subtle transferences and obvious unhelpful responses? Both are avoided by an honest, authentic relationship. My personal belief is that a directee should be emotionally free enough to reject the prayer guide. If the prayer guide is real, not role-playing, and if a directee is able to see the guide's faults and quirks, he will then be free enough to assess the relationship for what it is and not endow it with the magic it does not possess! Therefore, I would suggest that, as a rule of thumb, a prayer guide should be free enough to enter into an honest and authentic relationship. Before a directee has reached the Contemplative Attitude, a prayer guide should be free enough to help the directee with any method that might aid the development of the Contemplative Attitude. After this is reached, a guide should be free enough to be a balance at equilibrium. Always, the prayer guide should aid the directee towards freedom and independence from herself.

            It may be wise here to list some of the key freedoms that a directee is likely to experience during this phase. There is the freedom:

            Later in the First Week, hopefully your directee will become free enough to acknowledge the subtle influences of the world on his Inordinate Attachments and, consequently, on the decisions he makes. In time, he may even have the freedom to desire and to pray for a simpler lifestyle in cooperation with others for the sake of the reign of God. Hopefully your directee is being led gradually to encounter these facets and deepening levels of Spiritual Freedom. He might not experience all of them in the course of his Exercises journey. They are, however, all significant gifts of God's love.

    Summary

    Specifically: Generally:
     


    Chapter Six

    Completing The Disposition Days
    Introducing The First Week Of The Spiritual Exercises
    Introducing Prayer Unit 6
    Short Commentary On P & F
    Use Of The Literal Text Of The Exercises

            We are now approaching the last interview of the Disposition Days and introducing the prayer material of the First Week. Hence this interview could include the following goals:

    a) Listening to the directee's experience of prayer material of Prayer Unit 5;
    b) Discussion with him concerning the meaning of the P & F;
    c) Reflection with him on the real learnings of this preparatory phase;
    d) A decision as to whether you should proceed with the suggested
        prayer pattern or with some changes and adaptations;
    e) Introduction to the First Exercise of the First Week.
    Listening To Directee's Prayer Experience

            As you listen to your directee's prayer experience, notice how he has been relating to the text of the P & F. Does there seem to be some appreciation and some understanding of it? Does he have a desire for this way of living? Has there been any appreciation which, perhaps, he himself has failed to notice; for example, he may say, "I definitely found the text of Ignatius rather dull, dry, and uninspiring ... but I agree with its basic content. I certainly would not have expressed it in Ignatius' way. All I know is that I really want to do what God wants...." Notice, from the way he has expressed himself, a kind of openness, a desire! This might lead to a discussion of the meaning of the P & F, particularly after you discover how he handled a) - d) questions of Prayer Unit 5. If he seems to generalize too much, then spend some time helping him to be more specific.(26) This will ultimately help him grow in the ability to understand and make correct judgements about his own interior movements.

    Discussion Of The Meaning Of The P & F

            Here, I seem to be stressing understanding more than experience. For Ignatius, understanding and feelings go together. He does not separate knowing from remembering, from feeling, or from imagining in the way that we do in our scientific and more rationalistic culture. In his historical context, feelings and thoughts were combined; unfortunately for spirituality, we separate them. In line with this, Ignatius invites us to pray for "spiritual appreciation" [62] and for an "intimate knowledge" [104]. Both are examples of the kind of understanding that contains desire and feeling -- an understanding of the heart. Further, unless one grasps with reflection and judgement what the Exercises text is about, along with the spiritual exercises it contains, one runs the risk of being superficial.(27) The P & F represents the summary of the fruit of the Exercises journey. It describes, in dry philosophical language of another age,(28) what Ignatius hopes will take place during the experience of the Exercises journey.

            It will be helpful to prepare your own answers from your own experience for the same a) - d) questions so that you will be able to speak more personally and concretely with your directee about the meaning of the P & F. Consult the general remarks further on in this chapter for a summary of points that may be of help in this discussion.

            Through this discussion, stress the decision-making context of the Exercises. The decision-making context is important for your directee to appreciate, particularly, if he has been doing well so far and is likely to use the discernment techniques after his Exercises journey is over. However, it is even more important that you appreciate the decision-making context of the Exercises so that you will be capable of noticing how God might be calling your directee in the next months.

            Discernment, in Ignatian spirituality, primarily implies conscious decision-making. One learns the skill of using the Guidelines for Discerning Spirits so that one will be able to discern correct decisions about one's life both during and after the Exercises journey; whether these decisions are small or large, in one's private world or in one's public world. In Ignatian spirituality, discernment primarily designates responsible choosing with God[230], [231].

            As the interview progresses, notice whether your directee has experienced the presence of Jesus implied in e) and f) of Prayer Unit 5. Is he aware of how Jesus, the Risen Lord, is with him on this prayer journey? Is he aware that Jesus' Spirit is the one who gives him the Grace he is seeking by leading him through the needed enlightenment and strength toward the gift of Spiritual Freedom? Jesus' power now at work in us can do immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine (Eph 3:20)!

    Reflection On Learnings Of Preparatory Phase

            As this preparatory phase comes to an end, it is helpful to spend time reflecting together upon the learnings and experiences of the past weeks:

    "During these past several weeks, how have you grown? ... What have you learned about prayer? about yourself? about God? ... What key graces have you received? ... What has God shown you that you would want to remember as you proceed with the Exercises journey? ..."
    Through such a reflection, you hope that he "claims" and "owns" the gifts he has been given during this phase, that he appreciates his experience of being loved as creature, and particularly, that he knows from experience how he has to "let go and let God" do the work in him.
     

    Decision About How To Proceed

            No doubt over the past couple of weeks, you have been asking yourself whether your directee is ready to enter into the First Week. Theoretically, a directee is ready for the First Exercise when he shows the signs that were outlined earlier. As suggested, some of the preliminary signs would be sufficient. It is possible, however, that your directee has begun to proceed well enough and is beginning to let go in prayer, but you judge that he could use a little more time to be ready. If this is the situation, you could either:

    Delay for another week by asking your directee to pray over certain definite texts from the past five weeks;
    or
    Introduce the First Week with scripture only. Use some scripture texts from the Additional Readings of Prayer Unit 6.
           On the other hand, you may perceive that your directee will need a longer time, even the better part of a year, in this dispositional phase. In this situation, you might still consider using the Exercises. You will need some prayer patterns to help your directee focus and learn to articulate his experiences. So you could move ahead by proposing most of the prayer units in this manual. The structure suggested may help to keep both you and your directee in a prayer guidance context. As well, many parts of the Exercises can help. If you use them for this, remember that you will be "using the Exercises to prepare your directee for the Exercises." In some places, you may need to adapt the prayer units more than in other places. Often with such a directee, many graces of the Exercises might be received at a later stage. Thus, during the Third Week, he might receive the graces that he was not ready to receive earlier.

            If your directee is still learning to focus or to articulate his prayer experiences, then make sure that you expect only this for the present. You might need to lower your own private expectations! No doubt, as you proceed to guide your directee, you will inevitably need to surface your own other hidden agendas that might "contaminate" your helping relationship.

            Notation [18] indicates a principle valid for the Exercises journey according to notations [19] and [20]; namely, the use of the Exercises text with the individual exercises should be adapted to the ability of the directee. Consequently, a directee, who is so filled with anxiety or has such a negative self-image that he is unable to move beyond the thought of sin to the hope and joy of God's forgiveness, could not "easily bear" praying over the literal texts of the First Week. In fact, you may judge that the literal text of the First Week should not be proposed at all, but rather an adapted version or scripture alone should be used. Some of the following suggestions may be helpful:

    a) David Fleming's "A Contemporary Reading" from Draw Me Into Your Friendship.(29)
    b) My own paraphrase from Orientations, Vol. 1 (revised and regendered), is closer in expression to the actual Exercises text than Fleming's "A Contemporary Reading" and is edited with the awareness that many directees are likely to remain in the Healing Mode(30) for most of the Exercises journey. This paraphrase could be profitably used in the First Week.
    c) The scriptural themes from this same Orientations, Vol. 1, p.89ff, "Through the Way of Purification," follow the same pattern as that of the First Week and could be used in their entirety.
    d) A much gentler approach during the First Week would be to use the following themes from Orientations, Vol. 1:

            In attempting to respect your directee's needs and before you decide to adapt the exercises of the First Week, make sure that you are free from your own personal biases that may arise from your own past struggles with the use of the literal text of the Exercises. Do not project your own needs and fears upon the directee because you might hinder the possibility of a more profound experience for your directee.

    Introducing First Exercise Of First Week

            So much for the possible adaptations that might be appropriate for the First Week. I continue now with the supposition that you will be proposing the literal text of the First Week of the Exercises and I make some suggestions for the introduction of the First Exercise.

            Notice how the pattern for Prayer Unit 6 has been set up. It begins with the a) and b) texts on God's loving mercy in order to establish the context for all the prayer exercises of the First Week. The f) scripture text describes the logical thrust and direction of sin without the saving love of Jesus. The context is one of God's protective and continuing love who is saving us now from the inertia of sin within our environment and our lives. The following are some suggested comments you might make:

    Short Commentary On P & F For Purposes Of Discussion

            When you introduce the P & F or listen to your directee's prayer experience on this theme, it is helpful to make some general remarks to explain its relationship to the Exercises journey as a whole. This explanation lays a groundwork for the later understanding that Ignatian spirituality is a spirituality of choice. Perhaps the commentary below may contain some ideas for your remarks.

    Praise, reverence and service:

            These are different facets of the felt experiences of being loved by God. They result from the actual felt presence of God's Spirit in one's heart (Lk 1:46, Rom 5:5). God's love for us and God's grace do not depend on our praise, reverence or service.

    God our Lord:

            This refers to Jesus, Lord.(32) The risen Lord Jesus, the Christ, is there right from the beginning of the Exercises.

    Service:

            For Ignatius, the service of Jesus is the furthering of his Abba's reign. This cannot be separated from cooperating with others in preserving the gifts of our planet and in sharing our resources for a more just world.

    All other things:

            Here Ignatius means everything and every thing that is not God and not my "real self": gifts, health, ways of prayer, body, society, limitations, use of gasoline, insurance plans, education, television, wheat, food, job, self-image, money, capitalism, political philosophy, books, church practices, second career, home, volunteer work, donations, size of family, way of raising one's children, etc.

    To help one:

            This sounds like a very utilitarian and a Jesus-and-me spirituality without regard for others, the immediate environment and that of the universe, and future generations. In an earlier culture, a utilitarian attitude towards the world may have been more appropriate. However, we know from our interdependence within the global village how our use of created things must also regard their relationship with others and with all creation. We must remember that the universe itself is a primary revelation of God's will for us. More mining and more devastation of the rain forests, which destroy the environment of our planet, can not be in harmony with our praise and service of God. Supporting, without question, institutions that are unjust to others is not in harmony with Christ's Spirit. All created things are gifts of the Trinity which reflect their desire to give themselves to all members of the human family. Through these gifts, we, in turn, share our lives with God in the midst of the human family.

    In as far as:

            Our interaction with the created universe can skew creation itself and our intended orientation and goal. At that point, our relationship to the created universe becomes disordered. Thus, created things, once gifts, can become hindrances -- idols and instruments of our greed and destructiveness. If our relationships with the things of creation are disordered, our choices, which flow from such relationships, are also disordered. For example, an Inordinate Attachment to status or security will prevent us from choosing a riskier work that may be more appropriate for advancing God's reign. Consequently, structures evolving from these choices and activities will not be in harmony with God's desires for us.

    Indifferent:

            To be indifferent is to be detached, free from, and balanced with respect to all those here-and-now influences that may interfere with making "correct and good"(33) choices [175]. We cannot be indifferent once we know God's desires for us.

    We must make ourselves:

            These few words can be misleading because all we can do is hold ourselves "as if" we are indifferent or free. The experience of real interior freedom is God's gift. Hopefully during the Exercises journey, there will be a moment in which directees will become free enough to discover God's desires for themselves. Spiritual Freedom is a life-long purpose of our spiritual searching. But it can also be experienced in a moment of time. It is this latter momentary Spiritual Freedom which is the immediate goal of the Exercises journey.(34) Furthermore, the more open we are to receiving this gift, the freer we become in our day-to-day lives.

    Choosing what is the 'more':

            The 'more' means that we desire to go beyond making good moral choices in our lives. This desire is a reason why directees enter into the Exercises journey [19], [20]. This freedom is a freedom to choose work, ministries, and ways of living that go beyond and affect the greater good. For example, a nurse, who is a widower with older children, and who has executive and business skills, reaches a point in the Exercises journey where he foresees himself choosing one of these two realistic possibilities:

    a) To spend time in a refugee camp helping to care for the needy;
    b) To enter an executive branch of the Red Cross foreign health service.
           Both possibilities are good; both are experienced as being in harmony with God's desires for him. After thoroughly investigating the data and after praying through the issues involved, he discovers that, in the light of Jesus' story, the second possibility for him, is the `more.' It would allow him to help more people in the long term because of its potential for affecting structural changes. It would also allow him to experience more fully what it means to be a follower of Jesus.(35)

    Dealing With Technical Desolation As Emotional Upset

            Sometimes it is more practical and helpful to treat what is technically Desolation simply as emotional upset. Your directee might have entered the Exercises journey with a decision of major importance just newly made, and although this decision could still be changed, his mind is already made up. However, when he is confronted with the P & F, he gets upset because he might have to go through the struggle of re-making his decision all over. This fear may be well-founded. God may indeed be inviting him to reconsider this decision within the context of Spiritual Freedom. In a case such as this, you need to determine what the reaction means. Counsellors often ask, "Where is this reaction coming from?" So should you as prayer guide.

            First of all, this reaction may flow from his insecurity; perhaps he is the type of person who doubts himself so much that any hint of a mistaken choice throws him into a panic. If so, encourage him to stay with the original decision and to pray for the freedom to trust himself more, to be free from the panic, and to proceed with the Exercises journey.

            On the other hand, God may be challenging him to re-negotiate the original decision. If this seems to be the situation, then it would be helpful to suggest that he pray for freedom. This prayer for freedom is to be made at any time during any assigned prayer exercises, whenever he becomes aware of an Inordinate Attachment to his original decision [16].

            However, there is a third scenario -- your directee may manifest a combination of these two. If so, it may be better to allow him to talk out his fears and to encourage him as you would have in the first instance. Let the challenge be faced at a later time. Usually it will surface again.

            The second scenario represents a directee who has a good self-image and is confident. The first and third scenarios represent a directee whose self-confidence is so low that his anxieties and panic may interfere with his prayer experiences for two or three months. Technically all these scenarios are examples of Desolation. At this early stage in the Exercises journey, it would be better to treat only the second situation as Desolation, but it would be more practical to treat the first and third situations as emotional upset alone. For the directee in the first scenario, the emotional upset might later be revealed as a way for him to recognize his need to trust his own interior experiences.(36)

            For the directee in the third scenario, the Desolation of challenge will probably surface when he has grown in self-confidence flowing from God's healing and forgiving love.

    To Use Or Not To Use The Literal Text

            Why would a prayer guide ask a directee to use the literal text of the Exercises for the prayer exercises in place of a more up-to-date version of the text or scripture alone? Can a directee not receive as deep an experience from the use of any adapted version? From the perspective of this manual, the answer presumes you are using the Exercises as an instrument of formation. As well, the presumption is that your directee is rather self-accepting and has leadership potential with the hope he will use the Exercises as an instrument of ministry with others.

            The literal text has more "bite" than most adapted versions. It forces the directee to surface his own operative belief system as he struggles to understand Ignatius' expression of the symbols of revelation. For example, his struggle to understand the Third Point of the First Exercise may help him realize that he really never has believed in eternal separation as a possible consequence of his sin! This lack of belief is a possible block to the experience of Jesus' forgiveness and salvation. Admittedly, the use of the text to surface the directee's operative theology was not the purpose of the original Exercises text.

            The Spiritual Exercises was written in a culture with a worldview different from our own. This worldview was common to all the potential directees of Ignatius' era. They probably understood and thought about sin, world, God, heaven, hell, spirits, infancy narratives, church, Christians, non-Christians, and authority in much the same way as Ignatius did. Though adaptation was always presumed, the idiom in which it was written was part of the common ground between prayer guide and directee. No cultural translation -- between past and present, between a more static worldview and a more developmental worldview, between hierarchical exclusiveness and consensual inclusiveness -- was necessary the way it is now. Both prayer guide and directee possessed the same language to talk about their religious experiences. Therefore the prayer guide was to give only brief introductions to the prayer material [2].

            Our time is so different. There is little common ground between directees even within the same Christian denomination. Any one tradition today manifests a pluralism of worldviews. One contemporary reading that fits one directee might need to be translated before it fits another! We might use the same religious language but our words carry different meanings. Some adapted versions of the Exercises use such general phrases that different persons will accept them without question even though they themselves possess differing notional and operative theologies. The literal text, by forcing both prayer guide and directee to discuss its meaning, can become a good instrument to deal with each other's operative belief systems because the literal text can:

            Furthermore, scripture alone, independent of the literal text, is not as focused. Where in scripture do you find the kinds of comparisons that Ignatius instructs a directee to make in the First Exercise? Where in scripture do you find a text that is as focused as any one 'point' of the Three Classes of Persons?

            Professional teachers will tell you that students often miss the point when, however clear, a teacher's presentation requires no real personal engagement by the students. They seem to get the insight and grasp the point more effectively when they have to wrestle with the material. Could this principle not also be true when directees are introduced to the concepts and technical language of the Exercises?

            For the directee who is educated, has leadership potential, and is properly disposed, the Ignatian text can become a tool of spiritual leadership and discernment. After the Exercises journey is over, his familiarity with the literal text will help him reflect on, and hopefully understand, his own personal experiences according to a traditionally accepted and a more universal religious language. Thus his varied experiences during the Exercises journey will not be simply "good experiences" with some generalized understanding and some sense of what they "might" mean; they will be specified by a correct name as an experience of Indifference or Inordinate Attachment or `call' or Desolation or Consolation, etc. Later when he encounters other religious experiences in himself or in others, this use of the literal text will have become an instrument to help him think about, recognize, and make judgements about these experiences. Also for those directees who want to develop their ministry skills more professionally in a variety of settings, the literal text will serve as a common framework giving a basic homogeneous language for sharing and understanding spiritual experiences and for arriving at Communal-Societal decisions based on these experiences.
     
     

    Summary

    Specifically: Generally:

         Reflections on P & F

    Use of literal text:
  • Gives more focus;
  • Surfaces operative theology;
  • Establishes a common ground that:
  • Gives framework for understanding discernment in pluralistic culture while still keeping in touch with consistent tradition;
  • Empowers others with practical technology for decision- making for future use one-on-one and with groups.
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    Endnotes For Chapters 5 & 6

    17. Professional practitioners of the Exercises in the closed retreat setting often remark how, during the Exercises, some directees receive as much insight and healing as another person might in two years of therapy on a bi-weekly basis. The dynamic of the interaction between God and the directee, in itself accomplishes much healing. During the Exercises journey in the closed setting of notation [20], a director might only need to meet daily with her directee for a short space of time.

    18. Among the different ways of making the Awareness Examen, you might find helpful those in my Orientations, Vol. 1 (Guelph: Loyola House, 1994), "Examen Of Consciousness," pp.159-160. Also, "Developing A Discerning Heart," pp.161-176, is a practical process which gradually teaches directees how to listen to their own interior reactions and leads them to the art of noticing spiritual movements. This latter format was developed for those directees in ongoing spiritual direction who are not in touch with their feelings.

    19. This same point, concerning the parallel between the Awareness Examen in daily life and the Review, is made by William A. Barry, S.J., in Spiritual Direction and the Encounter with God: A Theological Inquiry (New Jersey: Paulist Press, 1992), Chapter 3, "The Religious Dimension of Experience," p.24ff.

    20. This is frequently called the consciousness examen, examen of consciousness, or awareness exercise. Throughout this manual, I use the term Awareness Examen.

    21. We presume that our directees know how to make some form of examination of conscience because this is so basic, but Ignatius did not presume this as we can note from his instructions in notation [19]. He was writing during an era when frequent use of the sacraments of reconciliation and eucharist was not common, and so persons had to be taught the fundamentals again. Do we also have to teach some fundamental practices today?

    Remember this basic principle when guiding another's prayer: subjective experience is validated by objective practice -- "by their fruits you will know them." A prayer guide ought to give some thought to issues related to this dictum. What practices or outward signs in worship and in both interpersonal and societal dealings would you expect to be present in your directee's life -- signs on the external level that indicate that he is growing in discipleship? I think some form of the examination of conscience is one of these practices.

    22. George A. Aschenbrenner, S.J., "Consciousness Examen," Review for Religious, vol. 31 (1972), pp.14-21.

    23. This image of reading a special letter from someone we love contains all the aspects of what Ignatius means by 'Meditation Using the Three Powers of the Soul.' This meaning is much different from the one communicated by older commentators which depended on a 19th century understanding of the Ignatian text. They equated this method of prayer with a discursive method which was more of an analytical exercise.

    24. Peter Faber, one of Ignatius' early followers, spent two years in this phase because Ignatius did not judge that Faber was ready to undertake the Exercises. However, when Faber's Exercises journey was over, Ignatius judged Faber's experience to be profound. He recognized how Faber could become an important director of the Exercises in his time.

    25. The paragraph which begins with the words: "The Disposition Days of which the P & F is a part..." to the end of the following paragraph marked by this endnote is taken and adapted from Ruth Barnhause, Journal of Pastoral Care (September 1979). Many of the words and phrases are hers.

    26. Directees, as do other religious people, often use generalized code language in talking about their prayer experiences. Some dislike being concrete. Sharing of experiences with God sometimes tastes and smells like processed cheese! (Thanks to Peter LeBlanc for this image.) However, this does not deny the fact that most very down-to-earth and spiritually mature persons can only express what is deepest in their hearts through symbol and metaphor. But they do so with the taste and smell of real cheese.

    27. Confer Jm 1:23; Mt 13:23; notations [2], [22].

    28. The text of the P & F is dated from the time Ignatius went to the university in Paris, two decades after the main body of the Exercises were written.

    29. David L. Fleming, Draw Me Into Your Friendship (St. Louis: Institute of Jesuit Sources, 1996). His contemporary reading could be used by itself.

    30. In this manual consult, Chapters 24, 30, and the Glossary.

    31. Ignatius wrote from a male point of view. The typical sin of men is pride. In our western and North American culture, the typical sin of women, until recent times, has been `hiding,' with a fear of acknowledging and expressing their real person. On a theoretical and logical level, this hiding is probably a form of pride along with fear and an inappropriate need to be accepted. But emotionally, it is not. With women directees who are not in touch with their real selves, the `pride' comparison could be dangerous and could lead to greater interior slavery. Consult Susan Nelson Dunfee, "The Sin of Hiding: A Feminist Critique of Reinhold Niebuhr's Account of the Sin of Pride ," Soundings, vol. 65, no. 3 (1982).

    32. Ignatius' imagery and language for God and Jesus comes from the days of kingly courts and feudal culture as can easily be seen from his use of the title, Divine Majesty. We can replace such language with a more biblical language. The title, Lord, from the Exercises connotes the more biblical title, Lord, as in "Jesus is Lord," as well as the feudal title.

    33. This phrase comes from Puhl's translation.

    34. Theoretically this is received after the prayer upon the Three Degrees of Humility [167]. Does your directee seem to have the kind of character and natural generosity to want to be disposed for this gift?

    35. This implies that, at some point during the Exercises journey, a directee would experience such love for Jesus that he would desire to imitate Jesus even to the point of being ready to embrace the kind of rejection which Jesus experienced [97], [98], [147], [167]. This kind of love is summarized in Prayer Unit 20, in the vocal prayer entitled, "To Follow Jesus Closely."

    36. A directee must develop the capacity to be in touch with and trust his own feelings if he is going to learn to discern and be dependent upon the Spirit's inner promptings.
     
     

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